Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil:  The Musical

Book by Taylor Mac

Music and Lyrics By Jason Robert Brown

Choreography By Tanya Birl-Torres

Directed By Rob Ashford

Based on the New York Times Best-Selling Book By John Berendt 

Excerpt:

LAVELLA.  She can’t just waltz in here and be a debutante.

BOBBY.  Isn’t that the gig?

CHABLIS(to Lavella).  Oh baby, there’s room for everybody.  I’m just here to give out the deep belly laugh pussy jiggle.  Oh she clutched the pearls.  You know if your pussy jiggles from laughing that ain’t a pretend good time, that’s the real thing.  That means your heart’s been lifted.  And when your heart’s lifted, you get—not just one chance—but all the chances you need.  And maybe you noticed, I ain’t a physicists.  Still, you can’t have someone higher than you-LIFT YOU UP.  You need someone lower.  That’s what you call, me.  Lower in status than the Low Country herself.  But hey, y’all need someone beneath you to show ya how goooooood the low can be, let’s get to it.

LAVELLA(to Bobby).  Are you gonna control this situation?

BOBBY(to Chablis).  All right, young Miss, let’s all rein it in.

A musical trigger.  

JEREMIAH.  Uh-oh?  

BOBBY.  What?

THE ESCORTS.  You said the trigger word.

BOBBY.  Rein it in?

Musical trigger. DEMONS OF HISTORICAL PAIN, from CHABLIS’ past, suddenly sweep in.

.BURT. Keep it clean, Chablis.

CHABLIS.  Burt, what you doin’ here?

MAMA.  That child will never learn to control herself.

CHABLIS.  Mama?  

BROTHER.  Why you always gotta embarrass me?

CHABLIS.  Little brother?

REVEREND.  As God as my witness, quiet down.

CHABLIS.  Reverend?

PRINCIPAL.  You always gotta be the class clown?

CHABLIS.  Principal Edwards?

VERA.  This is a public square.

CHABLIS.  White lady?

The DEMONS all repeat their individuals lines three times, simultaneously with the following added

BOYFRIEND 2.  Don’t let ‘em see me with you.

BOYFRIEND.  Why you always gotta make a scene?

MEAN GIRL.  An embarrassment to women.

LAVELLA.  A man in a dress pretending he’s Cinderella.  

CHABLIS(cutting them all off).  Ahhhhh!  Get out of my head dirty demons of historical pain!  

The DEMONS exit.  

CHABLIS.  Jack baby, Savannah’s proving herself too small.

JACK.  Even for her own Empress?

CHABLIS.  It’s time to hit the road.  

JACK.  You sure?

CHABLIS.  There’s a whole world out there, bound to be salivating for what I got to give.  

JACK.  That mean we’re touring drag brunches?

CHABLIS.  Two tears in a bucket.  Motherfuckit.